On the docket for this review is The Collar: The Planner for Those Who Serve With Intent by kame bat.
This book isn’t a “traditional” book per say; it’s a mix of an educational text, a work book, a journal, and a planner. I’ve seen this book on many shelves, many wishlist’s, and had it recommend to me before so I decided to give it a look through.
Starting to go through it I knew from the start that the perspective it takes is, for lack of a better phrase, very “woo.” For those of you unfamiliar with the term it refers to “woo woo” and was originally used to describe the spiritual hippie type you often see comically portrayed in media. It was later reclaimed as a self descriptor. Now, I don’t think “woo” is bad. It’s just not for me. I personally keep any kind of spiritual ties separate from my dynamics and service; my dynamics and service are very much more cerebral.
Keeping that in mind, I went onward to try to evaluate with as little bias as possible.
So starting off with the things I like about this book! I really like that there are sections asking questions about yourself and why you’re doing the service thing. It’s more than just “why do you like service?” it’s getting into identity. One question is simply “Who are you?” I also like that in the beginning it asks you to think about why you are journaling and whether or not this is something your D-type looks at or is simply something for you. Also that your journal is about you and your path.
In the later pages meant to be used as a planner I like how there are sections that are multi-use or customizable to what you want or need. In the chapter talking about the various section the author even says you can cross out the title and use it differently if that’s what you need! Also that she considered that this is a planner and it is intended to be carried around with you, as a planner should be.
Now, on to what I don’t like about this book. Admittedly, there is a lot. This isn’t because the book is bad, but because I am insanely picky.
What I really don’t like is that this book is aimed only at people who are currently in dynamics. Each section asks you to think about the “One-you-Serve” and what they want and need. There is actually a section in the journaling part that is specifically asking you about your D-type. Also I don’t quiet like the constant use of “One-you-Serve.” It’s repetitive and quite frankly annoying, though I do acknowledge this could have been written before D-type and s-type were common vernacular.
I also don’t like the fact that keeping a planner and keeping things organized is also considered a journal. For me a journal is something you write private thoughts in and keep to yourself, perhaps show your D-type if that is something that has been negotiated. A planner or a household manual is something that everyone who needs to know that information can see; it’s also carried around with you and anyone could possibly see it. For that matter as well, there aren’t many “journaling” pages in the entire book except for in the very back.
But the journal sections, I really do not like those. The first two, “Commands and Quirks” and “Bucket Lists” are relationship and dynamic information. The “Commands and Quirks” section is for information about protocols, titles, and negotiated authorities and then “Bucket Lists” is self-explanatory. This is personally information I would not wanting to leave my house let alone be carried around with me.
next are the monthly and yearly overviews, which are simply grids to write out what is and isn’t happening in each month. This for me is more of a preference of detail, I prefer to have a daily appointment style book with a monthly calendar spread. The weekly planning spreads aren’t much better in my opinion, as they have only a small space to write the activities of a whole day in.
The thing I like the least about this book is that while she talks about how it’s supposed to be customizable to your needs except it really isn’t. The pages are arranged in a way that would make sense to her and how she would arrange her journal and planner, which may or may not work for individuals. She also talks about how she intentionally makes it so the book is a paperback book in this size so one can carry it in a back pack or purse easily. If I had to be stealth about being kinky there is no way I would carry around a book that is at least an inch thick that said “The Collar” on it. Then because of the binding I would find it quite difficult to write in actually. If I had purchased the book with the intention of using it and not just seeing what it was about, I would actually be very upset right now.
While this book is not for me, I do want to reiterate that it doesn’t mean that it is a bad book. I am incredibly picky about how I organize my planners and schedules (to the point that I often create my own appointment books). All of this is a matter of my opinion. While I won’t be using it for it’s intended purpose her writing and some of her sections have given my ideas for my own planners and manuals.
In love and leather